Category Archives: TV

In which Liz tells Frank about TV episodes or entire shows he’s missed.

Maureen Tells Liz What Happened In “The Wire” Season 1

Dear Frank,

Hey, people like to tell me stuff! Really! It’s very nice of them. Today, that person is the vunderbar Maureen McEly, whose blog is really, really fucking funny. Here, she is informing me — and by extension the world — about one of television’s greatest achievements. She uses less profanity than I do, but we’ll forgiver her for it.

Love,
Liz

Hey Liz,

The_Wire_-_Season_1I know we mostly love to talk about cryptozoological erotica (you were part of that FB conversation right? Otherwise this just got super weird, right off the bat) and David Duchovny/Gillian Anderson flirtation. But for a change of pace, I thought we’d delve into the Baltimore’s violent and depressing drug trade, as depicted in The Wire! Don’t worry, even though it’s a bleak and complicated universe, it’s actually very (wait for it) addictive. (Get it, Liz? Because of drugs?)

Horrible puns aside, let me get this out of the way: everyone who told you to watch The Wire was right. You should. Ugh, I know. I can’t count the number of times I’ve been told to watch The Wire. It got to a point, at the peak of Wire popularity, where I felt like literally everyone I met was recommending, no, insisting that I watch it. It was pretty annoying. I think I’ve had this exact conversation 200,000 times in my life:

Smug Dude: “What, you haven’t seen The Wire?? Wow.” *Looks at me in a sympathetic yet condescending way* “You really should. It’s so realistic.

Me: “Yeah, it looks like you probably know a lot about life on the streets of Baltimore.”

Smug, Now Slightly Offended Dude: “Well, what I DO know is that it’s the best television show ever created.”

Bored Me: “Really? I have never heard that before in my life. The Wire you said it’s called? Let me write that down!”

Then, in my head, I’d fervently declare I’d NEVER watch The Wire< because it couldn’t possibly live up to the hype, and also because I don’t like being told what to do. But then I finally watched it this year and… yeah. They were all right. God damn it. Sorry, everyone I met between 2002 – 2010. Read the rest of this entry

DARK ANGEL: Liz Tells Frank Live Ep. 1

Dear Frank,

You already know that our first official Liz Tells Frank Live is on YouTube, but let’s dial it up a notch! A PODCAST-Y notch.

Screen Shot 2014-10-26 at 4.00.19 PM

This is just the beginning of the podcasting action, Frank! Because as you well know, last Friday we got Sucker Punch-ed. And that, in many forms, will be COMING SOON.

Love,
Liz

Liz Tells Frank What Happened In “Dark Angel” LIVE!

Dear Frank,

51sGkb7wjILA few weeks ago, you and I and some other awesome people got together so I could tell you what happened in the 2000-2002 series “Dark Angel,” executive produced by James Cameron.

We learned a lot about pagers, Canadian science fiction, Ron Perlman, the not-too-distant future and safe sex. We unfortunately did not learn why the show was called “Dark Angel,” but really, there’s no actual answer for that.

It was a good time, and I have done my best to recapture the magic via the below video, which combines an audio recording from the evening plus my Keynote presentation dissecting this seminal moment in pop culture history — or, as everyone else likes to refer to it, “Wait, you mean NOT the show with Eliza Dushku?” Read the rest of this entry

“Agents of SHIELD” Season 1: The Skip It/Watch It Guide

agents-of-shield-official-posterOh, Agents of SHIELD — a big thing done… well, not so great. At some point, I may tell Frank in full what happened during the first season of Marvel’s efforts to bring its superhero mega-franchise into prime-time broadcast television. But I started receiving requests for a Skip It/Watch It Guide for this show back in November. Clearly, the people have demands.

Here’s the most important thing about SHIELD — if you don’t have fondness in your heart for Joss Whedon and/or the Marvel Movieverse, you should probably just skip the whole damn thing. This show has potential, and definitely improves as it progresses, but it is an investment that you’d be totally justified in not wanting to make. Even though ABC did agree to continue the show, we’ll all look back on this season as a groundbreaking, but at best troubled, 22 episodes.

In a perfect world, this show would have been 13 episodes long, there would be a lot more make-outs and the hacker chick would have been shot in the head halfway through. This is not a perfect world. But for Whedon fans, superhero fans and those intrigued by what SHIELD might mean for the general media landscape, it will spark some interest. So, here you go. Watch in good health. This guide, I admit, came out as much more generous than anticipated. But that’s life in the NFL. Read the rest of this entry

Liz Tells Frank What Happened In “Scandal” (Sorta.)

Dear Frank,

scandal-embed1I still haven’t watched True Detective yet. I know! I don’t have any really good excuses. It’s all available, right there on HBO Go, and I know that it is quality zeitgeist television that will Change My Life or at least Be Intellectually Stimulating.

But instead, while I work and write and keep up with the internet, I’m rewatching Season 2 of Scandal. This is in part because Scandal does not require one’s full attention. But also because ugh, Frank, Scandal is just SO GOOD.

And I say this as someone who has not typically enjoyed the television stylings of one Shonda Rhimes! I mean, mad props to her — I have the utmost respect for how she’s created three television shows and developed many more and worked with young, up-and-coming talent and the whole time remained completely true to her own voice.

But I got really mad at the Grey’s Anatomy pilot when Meredith Grey had an one night stand and OMG that one night stand was her new boss! So I never really watched Grey’s Anatomy, or Private Practice, and was totally ready to write Shonda Rhimes off forever.

And then Scandal happened! Scandal, you beautiful silly complicated slutty minx of a series. Read the rest of this entry

Liz Tells Frank What Happened In “How I Met Your Mother”

Dear Frank,

how_i_met_your_motherSo it’s been a little while — sorry about that. There are a number of reasons, most of which boil down to “I really am going to tell you about After Earth out of revenge for it NEARLY KILLING ME the first time I tried oh god that movie’s bad.”

But someonething I loved left us forever this week, and I’ve been waiting for years to tell you about it. Once upon a time, Frank, this guy named Ted made his kids listen to the story of how he met their mother. It only took NINE SEASONS, Frank, but tonight that story came to a close.

And look, I could get into a lot of the details about this epic journey through the mid-20s to mid-30s years of a group of attractive white Manhattanites. I mean, just for starters, Ted’s many failed relationships, the incredibly loving marriage of his best friends Lily and Marshall, their womanizing buddy Barney’s love of manipulating women into casual sex, Ted’s long-time crush Robin’s pursuit of success as an on-air journalist, Lily’s failed art career, Marshall’s struggles as a corporate lawyer, Ted’s architectural obsession with the Empire State Building, Lily’s credit card debt, Robin’s secret past as a Canadian teen pop star, Barney’s black half-brother, Marshall’s obsession with puns, that time Ted and Barney licked the Liberty Bell, the Slap Bet…

Like I said. I COULD GO INTO DETAIL. But Frank, you want to know who the mother is. We all have wanted to know who the mother is FOR NEARLY A FUCKING DECADE. So I’m going to tell you. Read the rest of this entry

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