Dear Frank,

So remember that whole not-drinking thing I mentioned last time, Frank? Well, over the subsequent week, I decided that maybe instead of quitting drinking entirely for a month, I would instead work hard to practice moderation. I won’t lie to you — knowing that Battlefield Earth was on the horizon was a factor in that.

You might be surprised to learn, however, that I didn’t drink a lot while watching the film. That was due to some innate sense of self-preservation, knowing that if I did drink too much, I’d black out and forget what had happened, which would be a good thing in the long term but bad in the short term, as I’d then have to watch it AGAIN. Because OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, Frank, I know that saying that Battlefield Earth is a bad movie is hardly a revolutionary concept, but I don’t know if I can fully describe how fucking terrible this film is. It’s really truly amazingly the worst. Read the rest of this entry →